Res a Stolero Gestae
Librarian, linguist, analogizer, associator, ex-Latin teacher, ex-bicycle messenger, ex-Californian, ex-Bostonian, ex-New Jerseyan No, one never stops being a New Jerseyan
A Publication of the Institute for Analog Studies

Si quaeris monumentum eius circumspice
Lookin' sensitive. Click to see the history of Stoler in ID cards!

A wicked good time
A retro-page that looks as if it could have been made in 1995!
Hence, easily viewable on any mobile device!
Full of deprecated tags, and self-deprecation.
Apologies to Zevon's Old Velvet Nose
Hey, Shepard Fairey uses other people's images  himself. This is transformative!

The circle is complete. *I* am the master now.
Stoler has a Master's in Library Science!

From San Jose State University.
December 2006

If I could just get some pictures up...
Stoler has an entry in the Internet Movie Database!

Thanks to Andy!
February 2009

Doesn't everyone?
Stoler has a Facebook page!

If you want to "friend" him, please send a message first.
April 2009

Does that make him a twit?
Stoler is on Twitter! Follow him!

Though he doesn't post much.
August 2010

He plays with LinkedIn logs.
Stoler is on LinkedIn!
Be a cool person and join his network.
August 2006

Stoler has tattoos!
Well, no, he doesn't, despite promises to Beth. But if he could bring himself to take a week off from swimming, here's what he'd get around his left arm, around his right arm, on his solar plexus, and covering his back.

All These Things That I Have Done
Important and Timeless Stoler Documents with Portraits of the Author contemporaneous to the Works
And interspersed with Images of him wearing home-created Costumes, and Photographic Documentation of Voyages and Other Expeditions

Stoler has survived the pandemic.

So far.
May 2021, 2 weeks after second inoculation.
Hair has grown back...
Russian  blue, maybe?Someone's the alpha cat...

And there is a new cat in the house.

Scruffy, a stray from the animal shelter, caught us on the rebound.
Arya, October 13, 2007 - July 28, 2019 July 2019

Arya, October 13, 2007 - July 28, 2019 July 2019

2019-2020: Farewells to our beloved pets

Soots, October 13, 2007 - September 11, 2020

Soots, October 13, 2007 - September 11, 2020

the usual, with, of course, a bit less hair than the last one

2019: The THIRD and FINAL YEAR of the
DAH DAH, da da da DAH, da da DAH....
Stoler Writes and Records Song Parodies for Each Episode of Season 8

Ironic, isn't it?

August 2018: Book review for the Newsletter of the San Francisco Law Library

Amazing! Stoler can write concisely when called upon to!

January 2018: What can I say? The NOCALL News streak continues

("Some Writing on Rioting")

Two more NOCALL News articles:"Lingua Latina pro Bibliothecariis Iuris"
September-October 2017: Part I, Pronunciation
November-December 2017: Part II, Grammar

Picture for new work ID...

2017: The SECOND YEAR of the
DAH DAH, da da da DAH, da da DAH....
Stoler Writes and Records Song Parodies for Each Episode of Season 7

The castle has NO chance...

June 2017: And yet ANOTHER NOCALL News article...

("Dinner at Maxims")

"Another damn'd thick, square book! Always, scribble, scribble, scribble! Eh! Mr. Gibbon?" - The Duke of Gloucester, 1776

April 2017: Stoler has ANOTHER article in a local law librarians' newsletter!

("A Modest Proposal on Propositions", NOCALL News)

January 2017: Stoler has an article in a local law librarians' newsletter!

("Fairness and Accuracy in Reporters", NOCALL [Northern California Association of Law Libraries] News)

Little change of pace...

2016: The
DAH DAH, da da da DAH, da da DAH....
Stoler Writes and Records Song Parodies for Each Episode of Season 6


try to put THIS one on a beanie
Another Birthday Geekfest
-- Pacific Coast Air Museum
(March 2014)

after tubing through tubes

(September 2013)

Amazing, spectacular, friendly neighborhood...

2012: Stoler as Spiderman

2011: Stoler as Captain America
(retro-WWII-style from "The First Avenger")

The First Avenger had just come out

2006--2013: Stoler writes, produces, directs, illustrates, shoots, and edits skits and videos for his law firm's annual holiday party
Unfortunately, he can't really show them to anyone.
(Unless you're a possible employer or artistic collaborator, in which case, please email him.)

Look how much less hair he has...

Stoler Writes Another Silly Mash-Up

He looks nothing like the real Zuckerberg ... Thanks to <b>Beth</b>'s nephews for getting us to watch this.
Human bean juice...2009: Costumed for the First Show of "Watchmen" Costume Con San Jose 2008Good for pithy sayings.
Yeah, I'm making a meme of it...

Stoler Guest-Posts on
Beth's World-Famous Blog!
September 2007 December 2007
February 2008 May 2008


Find the cat in this picture!
And as a result, Stoler has his picture in The New York Times!

Unfairly -- Beth just happened to be away. Note the correction.
October 2008

Second Birthday Geekfest -- Hiller Air Museum
(March 2008)

On a Soviet submarine, San Diego Afer the Disney Half-Marathon

San Diego and Anaheim -- Disney Half-Marathon (August 2007)

First Birthday Geekfest -- Oakland Aviation Museum
(March 2007)

Papers written for Library School:

Online Resources for Lexicographical Searching
Spring 2005
Librarians are heavy drinkers

Frederick Winslow Taylor and the Systems Theoreticians
Fall 2005
My domain, my very well organized file room

Reclassification of Public Documents at the National Archives
Spring 2006
Not sure what this book was, but it looks old and interesting

Competitive Intelligence, Trade Secrets, and the Economic Espionage Act of 1996
Summer 2006
We switched to West codes

Anthony Panizzi as Organizer
Fall 2006
Panizzi started out cataloging these, and so did I!

This might have been the first time he did it...

Stoler's abortive attempt at blogging

On language and other Stolerish stuff. But he was too afraid of saying something offensive. Maybe again someday.

I was too afraid of saying something offensive
On the Ferris Wheel, Coney Island

East Coast Trip -- Wedding party with the family (July 2005)

On the lanai

Oahu Trip (January 2005)

Right there on Ellis St...

Stoler attends the celebration of the anniversary of "The Maltese Falcon"

The original, and still the greatest, San Francisco hard-boiled mystery...

The stuff that dreams are made of..

A prisoner of his art...


Like you have to guess what it's about..
The first film written by, produced by, and co-starring STOLER!

made for a budget of basically nothing with a cast of friends, colleagues, comrades, co-workers at the movie theatre ...

If you just want to see the *trailer*...

Master White and Master Pink

(in decreasing size order)
*Stoler's original treatment for "Reservoir Jedi"!
*The Second Draft
*The Shooting Script
*The Script of the Release

We looked good from the waist down too
See a large version
of this picture of
Beth and Stoler
at the gala premiere
of "Reservoir Jedi"!

There are no small parts, only small actors
Stoler appears in "Market Penetration", another movie by Andrew Hwang.

What are you writing? An obituary.
A short screenplay
written by Stoler with Andrew Hwang.
And another.

The Single Greatest Day of Stoler's Life

Here we are at City Hall.
December 3, 2004: Stoler and Beth get married at San Francisco City Hall

(Includes pictures of the reception at
The Mint and the "honeymoon" at The Inn!)

Stoler and Beth Attend the Terry Family Reunion in Nag's Head, North Carolina!

(August 2004)

Lost my sunglasses here, and someone mailed them back!
Stoler has a legal background.

Stoler's Final Paper for his Legal Writing Class
at City College of San Francisco,
on the Schwarzenegger Bobblehead Case!
(MS Word Document)

This man really scares me
At the Kilauea Crater

Stoler and Beth's Trip to the Big Island of Hawai'i!

(August 2003)

If adventure has a name...

Stoler dresses up like his favorite characters from George Lucas films


The Force is strong in this one?
My hat, it has three corners...

And gets Revolutionary!


Some trips Stoler and Beth took...(photo albums)

Beth in Tenafly

To the East Coast, in January-February 2002...

On the road...

To Utah, October 2002...

We were officially registered, really!

Beth and Stoler do the legendary Bay to Breakers race in costume!
And as a result, travel back in time!
At the time portal in Union Square...

Good Latinate word

Stoler's Favorite And Most Meaningful Nonlinguistic Analogical Jokes

(Many memorializing people who have passed.)

This would not happen to a slug
My good side, or my evil one?

An Issue of
It was called Stolern Moments,
Stoler's 2001-2002 personal newsletter!
(Hypomanic hyperlinked hypergraphia, though some of the good links don't work no more.)
Stoler really wanted to be a reporter then.

Bear, my best friend -- until I got married and the cats
Looking like a reporter here, too.

An Issue of the Company Division Newsletter
Stoler Used to Help Publish
When He Was At That Startup
Full of Obscure Inside Jokes You Probably Won't Get Unless You Worked for the Company Too (and the really funny stuff was probably my colleagues' idea, not mine)
(PDF file)


It's been H5 Technologies for fifteen years now

The Bearded Years:

Before Beth (or Bear)

The Terrible Papers:

Postings on the Guardian Online BBS, 1995-2000 (aka "The Ballads of Reading GOL")

the Jesus phase, when I didn't cut my hair for two years
December 1995 - July 1997

before I really started trimming and shaping it
February - July 1998

looking pointy, Satanic rather than Messianic?
November 1998 - April 1999

Cut the sides off, not long before I shaved the whole thing off at midnight, January 1, 2000
November 1999 - March 2000


The Nature of Intrinsicness

Some Fragments of Very Stolerish Fiction

Some More Fragments of Very Stolerish Fiction

Some Conspiracy Theories, or rather, Found Patterns

Festina lente
Learn Latin -- the Fun and Easy Mr. Stoler Way! (Powerpoint Slideshow)

Stoler's Y2K Doomsday Scenario Screenplay!! Oh Noooooo!!

A Humble Contribution to Forensic Science


Robert STRANGE McNamaraDr. Strangelove himselfSo hit the line for Harvard
Something About Which Stoler Once Felt Very Strongly


"Psyched for the Apocalypse"
a monologue or rant or something
Another try at growing a beard Pick an apocalypse, any apocalypse ... that could happen!
1993 or 1994

No beard yetIn Mali, West Africa, summer 1991Rome, you are my densityObstipui steteruntque comae vox faucibus haesitAeneid Comix
As a teacher,
Stoler attempts to create interesting educational materials
for AP Latin

The College Years

I went totally blond -- and had more fun!Like a 'Napoleon Dynamite' glamour photo.OK, it's a mess, but the points are validStoler's Senior Thesis -- On Puns!

"The Humorous Use of Linguistic Ambiguity"
Spring 1989

See, looks just like Stoler -- whose nickname at the time was ... 'Spike'! and like Stoler, into blood and chocolateStoler was experimenting with peroxide then...The Sort of Paper that is Really Fun to Write and Impresses Ivy League Semiotics Professors!
"Levels of Reality in Film"

Fall 1988

1988-1989: Stoler creates posters for a cello choir!

Bird is the word!
1987: Birdman and Robocop costumes

Stoler's Harvard ID, Fall 1986From the Icelandair magazine.See what I mean? This should be on TotallyLooksLikeDavid Byrne tried to look like him when he sang 'Swamp' in 'Stop Making Sense'
Allegorical Autobiography -- Or Pretentious Parallelism?
You Be The Judge
A Paper by Stoler on J. Robert Oppenheimer
Spring 1987

Stoler's high school yearbook photo, Fall 1984The Hunger Artist
Stoler's Expository Writing Paper on Kafka

(originally written on a typewriter, but scanned, OCRed, and edited)
Fall 1985

Copyright 2001 - 2021 by Stoler, Dauntless Designs, and The Slim Odd Cavalier Productions

Many thanks to


for hosting space and technical guidance!

Exegi monumentum aere perennius - maybe